You guys remember how, through some odd google rankings and a few posts I did on zombie research, and zombie love, and how google kept asserting me as a zombie expert, I somehow became the zombie queen? Okay, you probably don’t, but that’s why I’m reminding you.

Anyway, in my role of zombie expert, I’ve got a couple of links for you. The first, from Lifehacker.com, comes an advice article about how to date a zombie.Read More →

Just so you know: “zombie love”.  700 impressions. I couldn’t make this stuff up. “Dirty sex.”  I’m ranked 210th in all of google for dirty sex.  That takes you here: Vintage Inspiration I don’t care who you are, there’s some perverse pride in writing in a notebook like this. It says, loud and proud, though without actually speaking, “Yeah. I’m probably writing dirty sex scenes. You gotta problem with that?” Or something like that. Maybe that’s just me, your mileage my vary. Yeah.  It doesn’t get any hotter or dirtier than that, baby.Read More →

This blog is about reading and writing and finding things inappropriately amusing.  (I suffer from inappropriate laughter–it’s a real thing, don’t laugh.  Or do.  If you suffer from it, too.  I won’t judge you.  I’ll probably laugh at you, though.) The Z-word, which I’m not even going to write anymore because it’s taking over my site, is… well, it’s taking over my site. It all started because some stupid scientist who spells his name with a question mark did a study on surviving the Z-word apocalypse.  Which I totally believe will happen and we’re probably all screwed anyway.  We don’t need your research, Mr. Smith?.Read More →

I love looking at what search terms led people to my site–mostly because it’s so messed up. For your consideration, I offer the following: “zombies will never happen,” “zombie love,” zombie love story,” and “scientific zombie study.”  I tell you, I have become the queen of zombies.  And I write contemporary romance–not paranormal.  There are no freaking zombies in my manuscripts (not that there’s anything wrong with that). I also got “people flirt.” Well, yeah.  They do.  But what’s this got to do with me? Someone else searched “laurie sizemore aadom.”  Which is not me.  But, at first, I thought was cool, because I thought,Read More →

It’s that time of the month again where we laugh at the fact that no agents or writers or, dream of dreams, readers are visiting my site.  The only ones visiting are those crazy spambots and people making very strange search requests.  Here we go! nix nix Really?  What in the whole world do you need to know about this?  Well, hmm.  Googling revealed that, according to the Urban Dictionary: A middle aged man who plays computer games and has large man Breats. (Nix-Nix-Pix-Nix) That’s actually worse being associated with than I originally thought.  Thanks. a zombie love story, scientific study zombies, zombie love storyRead More →

I wrote a post ages ago about a quiz I took.  I entitled that post “‘You are a saucy flirt!’ –Lake Placid.” I even attributed it to the source, like a good writer.  Since then, every month, I get a hit or three based on a search for a “saucy flirt.”  Seriously.  Who are you, and why are you looking in a search engine for a saucy flirt?  Wait.  Don’t answer that. I also always get visitors from people searching my name.  I’m probably not the Lori Sizemore they’re looking for, but it’s the other Lori’s fault she didn’t have the foresight to buy theRead More →